{"id":509,"date":"2021-06-20T16:19:59","date_gmt":"2021-06-20T20:19:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/?p=509"},"modified":"2021-06-20T16:19:59","modified_gmt":"2021-06-20T20:19:59","slug":"dont-just-do-something-sit-there","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/?p=509","title":{"rendered":"Don&#8217;t Just Do Something. . . Sit there!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>Don\u2019t just sit there, do something!<\/em><br \/>\n(Aphorism, rightly or wrongly attributed to televangelist, Robert Schuller)<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/Sit-there.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"http:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/Sit-there-300x180.jpg\" alt=\"Sit there\" width=\"300\" height=\"180\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-508\" \/><\/a>. . . the admonition levelled at the shiftless, the lazy, the unfocussed, the unmotivated. Capturing the essence of the Western idyll, elevating the list-makers \u2014 or more properly, the list-completers. And vilifying the \u2018Type B\u2019s\u2019 (if there was ever such a \u2018personality type\u2019, characterizing the non-Type A\u2019s), as the laid back, feet-up-on-the-porch-railing folk who seem content to just watch the world pass them by. In short, if you\u2019re not moving, preferably forward, there\u2019s a problem. A restlessness, agitation even, a kind of culturally sanctioned ADHD has come to be the norm.<\/p>\n<p>Let\u2019s try another one: <em>For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction<\/em>. Basic, grade 11, Newtonian physics. And, so it would seem, basic social psychology as well. <\/p>\n<p>My sometime running coach opened our first conversation with a simple question: \u2018What\u2019s your distance?\u2019 Scraping away the obvious, he wanted to know how to shape a training program so it best served the mileage at which I intended to compete. I reasoned, from my modest (very modest) success in the dozen or so years I\u2019d already logged at the sport, that marathoning was an open invitation to injury. Equally, I was never going to be a successful miler. So it was down to what is affectionately known as \u2018middle distance\u2019 \u2014 the space between endurance and sprinting. He exhaled, clearly relieved at my decision. Metaphorically, I\u2019ve spent much time in this same space in the years since. Or at least tried!<\/p>\n<p>This middle middle ground is indeed a challenging and challenged place to live. Sometimes dissed as fence-sitting, equivocating, ambivalent, passive, uncommitted . . . the list goes on (and on). Sometimes lauded: balanced, equanimous, neutral, considered. Generally elusive and unsustainable . . . and almost always preferred to the polarities that lie to either side.<\/p>\n<p>The maxim of the <em>quick hit<\/em>, do it . . . and move on to the next (preferably as soon as possible), that so informs our culture in this era of the compelling need for instant gratification, is further complicating the process. The usual whipping boy (person?), <em>digital distraction<\/em>, heartily supported by myriad, internet-spawned algorithms and their wee squirts of dopamine (aka \u2018Likes\u2019, thumbs-up and their emoji kin) and immediate access to endless rabbit holes, may as much be a reflection and symptom as a cause. Automaticity, reactivity have been around for a very long time. A resistance to taking the \u2018long way round\u2019, \u2018sitting with\u2019, savouring, steeping is the norm. Goal attainment over process. <\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m currently slogging (??) through the 500 pages of Daniel Kahneman\u2019s <em>Thinking, Fast and Slow<\/em>, a wonderfully detailed review of the research of the past several years of cognitive process \u2014 and how we do it. The title is a very succinct summary of these findings: we spend most of our time \u2018thinking fast\u2019, using our intuitive takes on things, our \u2018knee jerk\u2019 (often factually unsupported) responses to navigate our day. He points out that this is frankly the only way to deal with the multiple decisions, needs for quick action that face us. But at a cost of \u2018slow thinking\u2019, where time is taken to weigh and measure, to consider the evidence, to make truly informed and thought<em>ful<\/em> choices. He neither lobbies for nor picks a preferred mode. Both are necessary and have a role to play. But his writing is a (relentless) reminder that critical (considered, slow) thought may be being further eroded, less valued, and just too time consuming. <\/p>\n<p>The case for \u2018the middle way\u2019 is both simple and ancient. Just not easy! Practice, repetition, noticing and embracing incremental, gradual change occupy a place <em>both<\/em> in long established wisdom <em>and<\/em> in an increasing canon of modern research as the mysteries of the mind are progressively married to the workings of the body, our physiology. The benefits of pausing, \u2018staying present\u2019, reflecting <em>and<\/em> reshaping our neural pathways (aka, neuroplasticity) are rooted neither in speed nor \u2018one-shot deals\u2019. Both require patience and many iterations. And neither happen without intention and purposeful choice. Auto pilot serves us well \u2014 until it doesn\u2019t. . . when life gets too complicated to just push back, to move on to the next rabbit hole, to dance to the limbic urgency to fight or flee.  <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Don\u2019t just sit there, do something! (Aphorism, rightly or wrongly attributed to televangelist, Robert Schuller) . . . the admonition levelled at the shiftless, the lazy, the unfocussed, the unmotivated. Capturing the essence of the Western idyll, elevating the list-makers \u2014 or more properly, the list-completers. And vilifying the \u2018Type B\u2019s\u2019 (if there was ever [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/509"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=509"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/509\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":510,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/509\/revisions\/510"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=509"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=509"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=509"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}