{"id":64,"date":"2011-05-09T13:54:00","date_gmt":"2011-05-09T17:54:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/?p=64"},"modified":"2011-05-09T13:54:00","modified_gmt":"2011-05-09T17:54:00","slug":"mirror-mirror-refletions-projections","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/?p=64","title":{"rendered":"Mirror, Mirror. . .Refletions & Projections"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Two folks with punk hair-do\u2019s, face-to-face, playing patty-cake. Perhaps engaging in something a little racier! Two sultans high-fiving. Bug \u2018blood\u2019 on the windshield. The whole idea is that the picture be sufficiently vague as to allow one to project<\/em> onto it (hence the naming of Rorschach\u2019s famous ink blot series as a \u2018projective test\u2019); but sufficiently suggestive as to not simply elicit blank stares. Maybe as a meaningful pipeline into one\u2019s psychological soul, this and other projective techniques left a bit to be desired \u2013 after all, are not the interpretations of one\u2019s responses just as subject to the practitioner\u2019s own projections? (Rather like looking into the mirror on the box of Pot o\u2019 Gold chocolates as the woman\u2019s image is reflected in the reflection. . . to infinity). But the concept of projection<\/em> itself remains as a most useful awareness for one to \u2018reflect\u2019 upon.<\/p>\n

My weekly source of inspiration seems to be narrowing \u2013 once again from Larkrise<\/em>. Alf\u2019s ballad, composed as a thank you to the community that has supported him, on the surface appears to be little more than a catchy tune about a wandering gypsy stealing the heart of a land owner\u2019s daughter, with things ending badly for the latter as her wild thing moves on, leaving her with a collection of burned bridges and few prospects. The intention is innocent and well-meant; the meanings attached as varied and unanticipated as the individuals who hear it. An endorsement to risk breaking out of the mold of \u2018service\u2019; an invitation to breach boundaries and orchestrate (or try) the future of others; permission to challenge one\u2019s parent; literal instructions in the niceties of catching a man. The tune becomes a template, a screen upon which one is able to project one\u2019s current situation, to which to assign meaning, and in which to read direction and \u2018truth\u2019.<\/p>\n

The trick of all this is to recognize the process as it happens. Freudian in its origin, projection is defined as a \u2018defense mechanism\u2019 \u2013 an (unconscious) strategy for dealing with emotions, experiences, etc. that are perhaps a bit too potent for the individual themselves to manage; more comfortably and less disturbingly dealt with at a \u2018safe distance\u2019 \u2013 perhaps happily assigned to someone else. The pitfall is in seeing this projected image as universally singular \u2013 the only \u2018interpretation\u2019 \u2013 and losing sight of its point of origin: ourselves. The person upon whom we project is generally only that \u2013 the screen.<\/p>\n

The recognition process should be simple \u2013 and obvious. But what\u2019s that expression: \u2018simple, not easy\u2019. In many cases, being the \u2018projectee\u2019 (i.e., the \u2018screen\u2019) is the simpler role. Oftentimes, in (heated or deep) conversation, one is left with the distinct impression that this exchange is just not making sense. That which is being \u2018assigned\u2019 to us simply \u2018doesn\u2019t fit\u2019. Good chance we\u2019ve just been projected upon. For the \u2018projector\u2019, the task can be a little more challenging, the \u2018truth\u2019 a little more elusive. A clue can be the goodness of fit between the intensity with which one finds oneself engaging in an exchange and the actual \u2018facts\u2019 of the case. OTT (over the top) is typically a good indicator of some measure of projection. Our old friend, attachment, accompanied by our other, by now familiar neighbour, ego, both (and for a change) may be helpful in identifying the projection process. Our \u2018need\u2019 to have our interpretation accepted, bought into by our \u2018screen\u2019 (often accompanied by little catch phrases as \u2018don\u2019t you see\u2019) suggests this is more our issue than that of our \u2018target\u2019. Once we\u2019ve become \u2018suspicious\u2019 of our intensity, motives, interpretations, a useful question to ask of oneself is \u2018what\u2019s being touched or triggered \u2013 in me<\/em>?\u2019 This is quite a different perspective than staying focused on the \u2018screen\u2019 and continuing to react to (real or imagined) elements we\u2019re convinced we see in the \u2018other\u2019. In one sense, we\u2019re reversing our vision \u2013 to<\/em> that of self<\/em>-examination and from<\/em> that of fault-finding, etc. outside of self.<\/p>\n

Mindfulness practice is able to provide tools both for \u2018catching\u2019 projection and for dealing with our awarenesses, once identified. Zindel Segal outlines a four-step sequence in aid of this process:<\/p>\n

Awareness of present experience<\/em>. \u201cWhat\u2019s the pull?\u201d Once we\u2019ve \u2018reversed\u2019 our vision<\/em>, take a gentle awareness to the spot, thought, feeling, or place which predominates in our immediate attention. Gently shift the attention away from the stimulus (the \u2018screen, as it were) . . . and back to self: \u201cWhat am I feeling, experiencing; what\u2019s arising in me<\/em>?\u201d<\/p>\n

Notice how one is relating<\/em> to that spot, thought, or feeling. Am I attaching to it? Becoming entrenched in it? Hanging on to it? OR are you avoiding it, judging it, resenting it?<\/p>\n

Stop trying to make things different<\/em>. Let it be. Notice and observe what is there. Practicing non-reaction, acceptance. A little visual trick at this point: Set a chair immediately in front of and facing you. On that chair, sit the person or issue that is triggering you and gently observe him \/ her \/ it. Develop a benign tolerance of its presence \u2013 without engaging. As with any strong feeling, we humans are programmed to maintain maximum intensity for a finite time \u2013 with that feeling\u2019s strength diminishing gradually as we allow it to be in our presence.
\"\"<\/a> Process: Bring a gentle attention to the spot, thought, or feeling<\/em>. Breathing into it; and out from it. Accepting what is there (\u201cIt\u2019s OK\u201d). Inviting the experience (\u201cLet me feel it\u201d) \u2013 using breath in and breath out to \u2018soften\u2019 and \u2018open to\u2019 the spot, thought, or feeling.<\/p>\n

Critical to this sequence is the recognition that we are, in fact projecting.<\/p>\n

OK, OK, so it was Mother\u2019s Day last Sunday!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Two folks with punk hair-do\u2019s, face-to-face, playing patty-cake. Perhaps engaging in something a little racier! Two sultans high-fiving. Bug \u2018blood\u2019 on the windshield. The whole idea is that the picture be sufficiently vague as to allow one to project onto it (hence the naming of Rorschach\u2019s famous ink blot series as a \u2018projective test\u2019); but […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=64"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=64"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=64"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidhowardpsychologist.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=64"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}